In the event of my untimely demise

This may be my last post, so there's a couple things I need to get off my chest:

Dave - There's $1,700 taped on the inside of your acoustic guitar. Save it for the coming storm. I really didn't piss in that drink. Or did I?
Steph - I truly hate you, I just never knew how to tell you.
Sebastian - It's MY baby.
Hambone - Set the kittens free. Set the kittens free.
Onions - Your sister isn't retarded, you are retarded.
Sean - Steve actually did swim in a pool full of Jell-o.
Gladys - I always loved you baby.
Cynthia - I always loved you baby.
Stacy - I always loved you baby.
Andrew - Thanks kid, thanks.
Rivers - Dude, Pinkerton was fucking great.

This may be my last post because I am about to dive balls-deep into the filth that plagues my house. I intend to purge this place of pestilence. Ten men made this mess, but only one can defeat it. I may fail, but even if I perish in the endeavor, my life will not have been lost in vain. I will have died fighting for what we all long for, freedom and the Canadian way.